Hopeless

The encouragement God is giving to me is becoming short lived. I appreciate them, but the more time is going on the more my need for results is growing bigger. 

The more signs I’m getting the more impatient I’m becoming because I’m tired of feeling like a horse being led by a carrot. 

I feel like I’m being stalled. The more time goes on and my needs aren’t met the more I start to question if God is real.


I give my burdens to the Lord, but where is He? Hello? Is anybody there? I lose trust in Him when I feel forsaken. He says He will not forsake us so then why do I feel forsaken? 

Why is this taking so long? I looked at the timing today for my pregnancy and it’s been 11 months and 1 day. I understand this is not a “normal” pregnancy. I understand this is happening for a reason. I understand this is Gods timing but I am weary. I’m not going to sit here and pretend like I’m not. Lying to myself about how I feel is a sin is it not? I feel weary, but I’m welcoming it in and that’s defeat well… there is no winning. 

I’m sticking with the facts. 

#1 I am weary. I have no hope left. 

#2 why hasn’t God stepped in to be there for me when I need Him most. Only God can save me.

#3 is feeling forsaken not being forsaken? Time is running out

#4 when something is promised to you and it isn’t happening it loses its luster and doing the will of God is harder. Nothing matters anymore

#5 I just want this to be over. I feel better about going back to the way things were before than continuing to believe and trust in God. I just want everything to be over.

#6 Im losing my faith more and more each day. I don’t want to hear it anymore. 

#7 I’m ready to give up completely. God take my life. 

I don’t mean to offend anyone that reads this but this is the way I feel. This is truth. 

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